8th Nov 2008...OuR MaRrIaGe

Marriage for a me,or for that matter for any girl is a sacred thing and cherishes this wish in the heart of her heart for a long time. I always dreamt of getting married to a handsome,caring,loving person. I found the day, the happiest moment in my life. Moreover, the was a very long and hectic process(but i did not feel,but now wen i sit back and think OMG!!!and i keep questioning myself.....was it me..). From the time the marriage fixes to actually it takes place, both the myself as well as my family members went through anxiety. Everyone was busy with the arrangements and preparations of the marriage. But I really faced a different kind of anxiety. I did not know whether to feel happy for going to embark on a new life or to get worried to think about how will I adjust my self in a totally new family(as from this very moment my surname,my gauthra...i mean my everything changed). For that single day of my marriage and for rest 16 days as I was the centre of attraction of all the people.I was adonred in my bridal saree,wore my vaddanam,and rest of the jewellary..which i was waiting to wear from the day i got them,and even my hair..was made...with flowers...srsly,I was looking stunning....!! Finally I was made to sit in the butta...or the basket....oh my Gosh!!!every girl waits for the very moment...and i was asked to do Gowri pooja....and my mammas' came carried me...from the place where i performed pooja to mandap...and i was made to sit...then the muhurtam time arrived.....wen Sridhar and I were waiting for last 11 months....Jeelakara Bellam(Jeera-Jaggery)....you wnt believe...and after that... wen we both had put Jeelakara bellam on our heads..the whole body vibrated from head to tip of the toe.no doubt i was possessive but after this very moment i become more possessive towards my SRIDHAR my love for him increased more......and even respect also increased...and after this Mangalya sutra Dharana....
"Mangalyam tantunanena mama jeevana hetuna:
kanthe badhnami subhage twam jeeva sarada satam "

which means
" This is a sacred thread. This is essential for my long life. I tie this around your neck O maiden having many auspicious attributes. May you live happily for a hundred years (with me). "

--this is the mantra that Sridhar read and tied the Mangalya sutram around my neck. And then the important post marriage ritual performed on the wedding day is Nagavalli. Saptapadhi, the seven steps & the vows, form part of Nagavalli. I and Sridhar pledge and declare to all those present that they have accepted one another voluntarily. Holding each other's hands,we took seven steps, symbolic of the seven marital vows, around the sacred fire. Sridhar gets up from the seat holding the right hand of mine.He then goes round the Holy Fire (Agni) from the right side, by lifting the right feet of mine step by step. The holy fire Mangala Fera, a great protection against evil, is believed to be a messenger and mediator between God and human. This fire acts as an eternal witness to marriage. the couple circle this ceremonial fire seven times, with the priest's,elders,friends' blessing .we took 7 rounds around the sacred fire representing the seven principles and promises being made to each other .
1st Promise-Together, we will acquire energy to share responsibilities of our married life.
2nd Promise-Together,we will fill our hearts with strenght and courage to accmplish all the needs of our life.
3rd Promise-Together,we will prosper and share our worldly goods and will work for prosperity of our family.
4rth Promise-Together, we will chesrish each other in happiness and in sorrow.
5th Promise-Together,we will raise dtromg and virtuous children.
6th Promise-Together, we will fill our heartswith great joy, peace , happiness and spiritual values.
7th Promise-Together, we will remain lifelong patners in the matrimony.
దురింగ్ నాగవల్లి, a silk cloth cradle was made and a piece of sandalwood, a ripe mango and turmeric was placed in it to pray for an off spring as healthy as the ripe mango, as pure as the turmeric and as self fragrant as the sandalwood. This is followed by a fun filled event where the we fight over who will collect the gold and silver rings dropped in a narrow mouthed vessel. Probably to check who dominates in the new family.( Sridhar won: Sridhar 2 Harita-1)Holding the my left foot toe, Sridhar then helps her tread on a grindstone called sannikallu kept on the side of the fire.The manthras say: "Mount up this stone. Let thy mind be rock-firm, unperturbed, by the trials and tribulations of life" and when it is finished, Sridhar adorns my toes with mettellu, silver rings. At this time the priest showed us, the Arundhathi Nakshtram. (Arundhati, the wife of vasisTha maharshi(the great saint), is exemplified as an ideal wife, the embodiment of chastity. By seeking her blessings, the bride expresses her devotion toward family life.)As a custom, My brother gave puffed rice to the me and Sridhar,which we put them in fire. It is a secondary post-wedding ceremony in which the priest lights a fire to which the newly married couple offer oblations of puffed rice or popped grains (lAja). This shall comprise the my own offering to the sacrificial fire. As she is forbidden to do it myself,my brother helped me. He gives her a handful of parched rice grains which I and Sridhar on my behalf, feeds it into the fire. Through this food offering, I seek a long life for her husband, and propagation of the family. Participation of the bride’s family memberwe stas indicates the continuance of links between the two families, even after marriage. The couple circle around the fire, three times, and the feeding of the fire with parched rice, is repeated thrice.The bride is formally handed over to the groom's family. This is a an emotional and tearful event. Before the bride is taken to the groom's home, her mother puts some rice in the upper cloth of the Madhuparkam and then ties it around the bride's waist.A small silver bowl,a tiny sandalwood doll, the root of yam,chalimidi are added in the madhuparkam.Now Wedding is done. Now we get into our new life. And From now...OUR NEW JOURNEY STARTS........(WHICH WE WERE WAITING FOR!!!)